This Sunday morning I'm getting baptized.
You know, the kind where you get dunked in a pool of water in front of a bunch of people. I'm kind of nervous about it.
Why am I nervous? Because I go to one of those giant mega-churches with giant screens up front and thousands of members will be watching. Because I am extraordinarily shy. Because I have to be there are EIGHT A.M. and by the time the baptism rolls around, I may be in a sleepy coma, since this is the Sunday after we roll the clocks forward. (Is it even going to be LIGHT out? j/k) Because every participant being baptized had to be interviewed and videotaped giving our testimony a couple weeks ago, with the tape being shown during the service, and I do NOT want my face up on aforementioned giant screens. I'm hoping that my interview was so lousy that they will either 1)leave mine out or 2)just give me a very brief voice over with a nice picture of lovely stream or ocean or something, and not show my face. Seriously. I do NOT want my face up there. Because we're supposed to invite "lots" of friends and family to come to the service with us, and I have neither. Unless you count my four big dogs, but I would imagine that even our casually-inclined church would frown upon my dogs, who love the water, joining me up in the baptistry.
So. Yah. Nerves are high. Confidence is low. Why am I even doing this?
Because of obedience. Because I want a closer relationship with God. Because if God says I can have something, I WANT IT. Ever since I signed up to do this I have been one big bundle of nerves and the closer it gets the more nervous I get. Honestly, I can't wait til its over. Actually, I sort of can't wait to be there AT THAT MOMENT. I am hoping God will bless me. Heal me in some way. Do something big in me that only He can. That would be really cool. But mostly I am doing it for God, because He put the desire for it in me a couple months ago, and then He made a way for it to happen (with this special baptism service at church this Sunday) so I figure that He must have something up His sleeve.