Jesus Loves Me, This I Know

Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so....
remember learning that Sunday school song when you were 3 years old? And singing it at the top of your lungs?
I loved it back then, and right now I hold to it tightly.
I continue to go through some hard times. Still waiting on desperate prayers to be answered. Still asking hundreds of people to pray for me about some things. Still hard. But this is something I continue to learn-- God is with me. He never leaves me. Even when I am in pain, even when my heart aches, even when I feel alone-- He is here. Listening. Comforting. Sometimes the comfort comes from the kisses and hugs of children. Sometimes it comes from a soft rain or a thunderstorm. Sometimes from a random email with sweet words. But He sends it still. While I wait for my prayers to be answered. And wait, and wait. I have learned so much about God in the last few months. Learned more about His character, become even more fascinated by Jesus and Who He is. As hard as these times can be, I wouldn't trade them for anything.

What I think I Need

Been short on words lately. You may have noticed. There's been so much on my mind but not a lot comes out these days. A few of weeks ago, two people in our family died just days apart. Between those things and some other stuff I already had going on, those heart breaks really just made me feel like God threw me under a truck for awhile.
I've not been the greatest at handling all the things that have been going on this spring. Instead of getting down on my knees like I should have been, I pretty much just curled up on the couch and played mindless games like Solitaire on my iPod. I quit going to Bible Study. I still showed up at church and Sunday School every week, because God draws me there.
But I didn't want to go anywhere else. So I holed up in my house whenever I could.
And I got a little sad. Lonely. A lot of people said "We'll pray for you." Which is great. Love that. Can't beat prayer. But this time I needed so much more and that's all people had to give. No one reached out by stopping by the house or picking up the phone to call or even dropping an email. That was tough to handle.
It was at those times to realize that I needed to rely only on God, that He is the ONLY one who will never, ever disappoint. He is the ONLY one who will NEVER, ever let me down. Ever. He can't-- its not even in His holy nature to do so.
Funny thing though. It was when I finally cemented this belief back into my heart about three days ago --that I just don't NEED anyone else except for Jesus, He TRULY is all sufficient-- that God allowed other people to do a few things for me that I thought I needed a few weeks ago. Funny how that works, isn't it? A surprise gift showed up on my doorstep from a friend that lifted my spirits. Someone else got all silly and painted my toenails bright pink to cheer me up. The baby is in a super-cuddly phase and wants to put her head down on my shoulder, all curled up in my lap (my favorite thing in the WORLD with kids!) and has fallen asleep in my lap twice today. I think that usually, once we remember Who it is we really need, He will allow others to step in and supply some of those needs for us. Clever guy, He is.

Philippians 4:19 (New International Version, ©2011)19 And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.

Reach out to Jesus (He wants you to)

Luke 8:42 As Jesus was on his way, the crowds almost crushed him. And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years,[a] but no one could heal her. She came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak, and immediately her bleeding stopped.
“Who touched me?” Jesus asked.
When they all denied it, Peter said, “Master, the people are crowding and pressing against you.”
But Jesus said, “Someone touched me; I know that power has gone out from me.”
Then the woman, seeing that she could not go unnoticed, came trembling and fell at his feet. In the presence of all the people, she told why she had touched him and how she had been instantly healed. Then he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.”

Beth Moore pointed out in her Breaking Free Bible study that the word traslated "edge" (Kraspedon) is used for the tassels the Israelites wore on the four corners of their garments (Word Bible Commentary).

Jesus would, as all good and proper Jewish teachers of his day, worn a prayer shawl with 4 long tassels hanging down, very similar to one pictured at the top of the page.

Do you see how easy it would have been for the sick woman in Luke 8 to reach out and grab hold of the edge of Jesus's garment? Those tassels hung down. As Beth pointed out in her Breaking Free video... Jesus made himself reachable. He made himself easily reached. It wasn't hard for the sick woman to grab hold of him if he had those tassles hanging down. He purposely made himself reachable to the lowest of the low.

That hit me hard last night while I was sitting in Bible study. Sent me on a trippy-revelation-double-whammy of a thought so that I've barely been thinking of anything else. Not only could that sick woman reach out to him-- but you know what? Those tassels would have hung down LOW-real low. No matter how bent over sick, no matter how low in the gutter we are, no matter how bent down with depression or illness or sorrow we are- Jesus makes himself reachable to us. He makes himself available. Even if we can only reach out justalittletinybit-- He is there. Think you've hit rock bottom? Jesus is there.Think you couldn't possibly go any lower than you are right now? Think you're in a pit? Jesus is there. Think your eyelids are so heavy from endless nights of crying that you can no longer lift your head to look up? Jesus is there. He has made himself available--this very moment-to you. From the compassion in his heart, from the experiences in his life, to the very way he got dressed in the mornings-- his goal was to make himself available to you. All you need to do is to reach out to him-- he is reaching out to you.

Comfort, comfort my people,
says your God.
Isaiah 40:1

Some days are like that...

Do you ever have those days where you just sorta feel like THIS:

NOW what do you want?!

Hey! Leave me alone already!

That's what sort of day I am having. I don't wanna talk to anyone, I don't wanna take care of anyone, I don't wanna be all deep and introspective, and I don't feel like taking care of everyone else's problems for once. Just one of those days I guess!

Thankfully, we have a Savior we can go to when we have days like this. As Jesus said in Matthew 11:28-30
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Proof that God Loves Us

The Bible says that there is proof all around us in nature that shows that God loves us -- that the stars, and all creation point to evidence of God. And then of course, there is the fact that God sent His Son Jesus to die on the cross for us 2000 years ago as proof of His love.

However, my 4 year old nephew, while toad-hunting tonight (his favorite activity this Spring) has apparently found the ultimate proof of God's love, and I quote:

"I am so glad God gave us toads. Does God love us? That's why God gave us this toad."

Well. You can't argue with that now, can you?

Toads and Jesus. Just more evidence of the love of God.
(I bet Jesus loved toads too.)

On Baby Love, Impossible Dreams, and not giving up

I admit that I have not given much deep thought to writing anything meaningful lately. The past 7 weeks my mind has been on other things... namely, itty-bitty diapers and supersoft blankies and teaching Big Sister and Baby Sister how to live in the same house. As I've been learning how to get 2 children with completely different personalities to function on the same schedule (HA HA HA!!! that's a good one, right?) my brain has been slowly turning to mush.
However. I.am.completely....utterly....in...love.
And I am also incredibly grateful. Amidst the craziness and dirty diapers and the toddler being a little jealous, I am crazily happy. These are the days that I used to pray for.
I remember all too well just 3 years ago, having 15 special needs preschoolers running around me, all needing my undvided attention-RIGHT NOW. And I used to pray so hard that God would just let me do what I wanted-- to sit in a rocking chair and give a baby a bottle and rock her to sleep. And boy, did THAT dream ever feel far off--impossible in fact. There wasn't even any possibility of that on the horizon, as a matter of fact. And well... now I've spent 2 years rocking and cuddling and hugging and changing diapers and going to the park. Three years ago, I would have bet good money that my dream would have never come true.
The fact that I am now living something that I used to dream about just amazes me. God is so GOOD to me. I don't deserve this, didn't do anything to earn it, and yet God in His love and compassion decided to give me something I wanted anyway. How amazing is that? Who else but God would do something so incredible?

How about you? Do you have a dream that's in your heart, something maybe even that you keep secret because you feel like you don't deserve it, it feels impossible, or it just seems too good to be true? I'd like to encourage you to pray about it. God specializes in the impossible. In fact, it seems to be where He shines the best.


Mark 10:27 Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God."

Read Joyce Meyer's article on "The Power of Hope" --> http://joycemeyer.org/OurMinistries/EverydayAnswers/Articles/art7.htm

The Passion movie... the best ending ever.

This is THE BEST ending to any movie, EVER.
The Passion is one of my favorite movies. And I have watched this ending over & over again many, many times. Each time, it gives me chills.
Today is Good Friday.... a solemn, quiet day. A sad day, because Jesus chose to die on the cross for my sins-- and yours.
However. Sunday is coming. And this...this is the best.

My Year of Grace

These were the words I wrote at the beginning of this year:
This year is going to be all about CHANGE for me.
And WOW, was it ever. I believed that I finally had God's blessing on finally changing... and oh dear, was this year ever about change.
2008 was about learning...about loss...about learning to go on again.
2009 has been my year of change, and learning about the grace of God.
Reading back over my journals tonight, I realize just how much God has changed me in 1 year. I didn't have anything to do with it, I think-- don't give me the credit, because I tried so hard for YEARS to change on my own and couldn't do it. But once I finally decided to cooperate with God, and got on HIS plan... things started to fall into place.
Finally (that's probably God talking, not just me!)
I still have a long long way to go... but at least now I am finally on my way.
In 2009 I learned to trust God more. I learned of His deep, unchanging love for me. I saw Him answer my prayers, both big and small, time and time again.
I saw my Provider meet my needs. I saw my Healer heal my body and my broken heart over and over again. I began to laugh more. The Lord made me a more appreciative, positive person. I'm sure there are people who know me who probably never thought THAT would happen. God even gave me many things I don't deserve, and answered some long-time prayers, just out of the Goodness of His heart.
Its all about grace...and not because I deserve it, not because I did anything for it, but simply because He is that good, because He is that loving.
In 2010... I don't know what will happen. Still waiting on those flying cars and making contact with aliens--weren't we supposed to have all that by now?
But in my heart, I know that I will keep on growing. My deep desire is to know Him more, to grow closer in my relationship with God and know His Word better, to spend more time in Bible study (I got this REALLY cool computer program called GLO for Christmas to help with that), and just become more like Jesus.
At the end of the year, I hold onto this: I am grateful. Things change... sometimes they are harder and sometimes they are easier, but I know that God can be trusted and He loves me. And for right this moment, that is good enough for me.

The night before Christmas Eve

As I write this, my niece and nephew are sleeping just a few feet away. They were anxious to get to sleep tonight, because they knew that "the faster we go to sleep tonight, the faster tomorrow gets here, and the fast Santa comes tomorrow night." Christmas being only a day away gives grown ups just a little bargaining power, I think. I helped my niece fall asleep to visions of fairies and sleeping bunnies and kittens in her lap tonight. But tomorrow night my plan is to read them the Christmas story from the Gospel of Luke, and instead of just visions of sugarplums dancing in their heads like most children will tomorrow night, and thoughts of opening toy after toy, I hope to have them envisioning a special star, a special baby, and the real reason we have Christmas in the first place.

I love to watch these 2 children sleep. It brings such peace to my soul. And especially at this time of year I wonder, what did Mary think about when she watched her infant Jesus sleep? The Bible says that she pondered the wonder of all that had happened in her heart when he was born. But what exactly goes thru a young mother's mind when she carries the Savior of the world in her arms? Did she realize that someday he would face such pain? Did she realize that the little boy who slept so soundly would someday free the souls of millions? Did she wonder if he would be hard to raise, given that he was GOD?

What would you have thought, if you had held the Savior in your arms that Christmas night?

The Safety of Psalm 91

Last night I watched some of the news before I fell asleep. I rarely ever do. It was disturbing. In 15 minutes, the reports were all about how many people in Texas have died of swine flu this week, how many troops died in Iraq recently, a child that died in an accident, a child that may die because of abuse, and more talk of war.
Rotten stuff.
I closed my eyes and said to God, "Lord, this world is so depressing sometimes. It feels so unsafe."
Immediately I heard that still, soft voice in my head: "Read Psalm 91."
So I picked up my Bible, and hear is what I read (with my thoughts added.)

Psalm 91
1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

2 I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust."

3 Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare
and from the deadly pestilence. (like swine flu)

4 He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

5 You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day, (like wars,guns,and soldiers)

6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday. (there's swine flu again)

7 A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you. (God will keep me safe in this unsafe world.)

8 You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.

9 If you make the Most High your dwelling—
even the LORD, who is my refuge-

10 then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent. (my house is safe because I trust the Lord)

11 For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;

12 they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

13 You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent. (I will overcome the evil one because of the Lord)

14 "Because he loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.

15 He will call upon me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him. (I can feel safe, because I call on God;He is faithful)

16 With long life will I satisfy him
and show him my salvation."

I felt so much better after reading that, especially since I believed that it was God who whispered in my ear to read those particular words of His. The world may be unsafe, there may be wars, plagues, and even death around me. But I believe the Lord will protect me.
Even last week, I was in a car accident. My car was SMUSHED. But I escaped with just some aches, pains, and minor injuries. It could have been much worse. I know God had sent his angels to protect me.
God is someone you can count on to protect you. If you feel unsafe and scared, call on Him. He and Jesus are right there waiting to wrap their arms around you.

I'm So Excited

John 10:10 (New International Version)
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.--Jesus
I am SO excited (as you may have gathered from the title.)
I've been sort of down the past couple of days, feeling rather...different, socially awkward, and down on myself. A little lonely-- missing people from my past. Wanting to talk to someone, but they're no longer around. Makes my heart hurt a bit. Could use a pick me up.
It helped a lot that on Sunday night and Tuesday night I was out around new friends and got a chance to hang out, got a few hugs. That helps a lot, probably more than they realize. I hope for lots more of that in the future.
And now I am really excited.
What about, you ask? Oh, I was hoping you would.
1. Today I got a bikini. Why's THAT exciting? Oh let me share. Because this is the 1st year I am not hugely embarassed showing my body in public. This is the 1st year that I'm not consumed by worrying about how I look, wondering what people think of me ("Do they think I'm fat/ ugly/ hideous?") I just don't care anymore. Although I'm still a bit boney on top for a bathingsuit to look quit right, my body is strong, my body is healthy, and I FEEL good.
2. We're going to my favorite waterpark in the world on Friday. It's the best place in the world to relax and have fun.
3. Just about 30 minutes ago I made reservations online for something I've been wanting to do for YEARS!! I am going ZIPLINING on Saturday! Imagine zipping through the skies at a breakneck speed while pretending you're a bird or a butterfly. Fun! For more info, peek here.
It is going to be SO much fun, and hopefully I'll come back home in one piece. Even if I don't, I still think the experience will be worth a broken arm ;)
Ziplining is one of the last things on my "Bucket List." I've gone up in a hot air balloon, swam with dolphins, spelunked in caves, climbed some mountains, screamed my head off bunji jumping/flying through the air and hurling towards the ground (4 times), gone on the fastest/tallest/steepest roller coaster in the world, and more. (You would never guess that I'm one of the quietest, shyest people you'd ever meet.) (Serious adrenaline issues though.)

So, I have a couple of exciting days coming up, as a nice gift from God and I am thankful.

Be Still

God has been dealing with me for about a year about Psalm 46:10- "Be Still and Know that I am God." Have you ever thought much about that one?
I am not much for being still. All my life I've been on the move. Besides being generally hyper, my mind has about 16 different ping-pong balls inside of it constantly bouncing around in different directions. Every day I'm on the go-taking the baby for long walks in the morning, working out while the baby naps in the afternoon (I love Tae Bo) and sometimes even taking the dogs for walks in the evenings. Even then, it takes a pretty heavy cocktail of medications to knock me out to sleep at night and shut my brain off.
Be active? That's my thing. Be still? Not so much.
But I don't know how many times in the past year God has spoken to my heart to "Be still."
I'm learning, but the past few weeks I'm having a hard time with that.
I'm learning to not worry anymore, to hand things over to God. Learning to take time to take naps, to take more time out to do things I think are fun, to just play.
The other part of the "be still" is "Know that I am God
That's the fun part (much more fun and interesting than trying to be still.)
I have been reading books about God and Jesus, and learning to listen more closely to God.
Yesterday I got some great books that I recommend to anyone who would like to get to know Jesus more and learn more about God and His ways:
Jesus, Man of Joy by Sherwood Wirt, Just Give Me Jesus by Anne Graham Lotz, and His Name is Jesus by Max Lucado.
Joyce Meyer also has some incredible CD set teachings on God that I've listened to over and over again: The Character of God (sorry, couldn't find the link), a DVD called God is Faithful and True, and Be Still and Know that I am God.

Diamonds in the Grass

On Sunday the dogs and I were playing in the sprinkler and I found this incredible sight... it looked like there were diamonds sparkling in the grass:

Can you tell what it is?
It's water droplets from the sprinkler on a spider web! Isn't it incredibly beautiful? The droplets were shining in the sun like nothing I've ever seen before. If you looked closely, you could see tiny little rainbows inside some of the drops. It made me think of Heaven, how all things will be made new. Everything will be perfect and shiney and the streets will be made of gold, and there will be light everywhere because Christ will be the Light of Heaven. Cool, huh? There won't be any sorrow or pain-- just happiness. Who needs real diamonds when you can come across beauty like this just playing outside?

To Know Your Name- Hillsong

This is one of my favorite songs-the louder, the better-- we sang it in church today. Enjoy :)

It's Not Fair!

The past couple of days I've had a self-centered attack of the "What about Me?"'s and the "Its not fair!"'s as I've allowed myself on occassion to give in to old thoughts. I've run into some people who have been getting away with things that are wrong, and that bugs me. I've run into someone I used to know who is whiney & negative, and manipulates people into feeling sorry for her, and that bugs me too. So I confess I've been feeling...perturbed. And a little judgemental too. And a little of the "this isn't fair!" stuff has snuck in there too. I try to always do the right thing, and I work like crazy to be positive & help others, yet when I need help-- is it there?-- not often. So, I went into a funk. Man, what about me? This isn't fair!

I have been praying & praying about this attitude of mine. I know it needs a MAJOR adjustment still. I don't want to have any bitterness or resentment in my heart. I'm not better than anyone else, & I do stuff wrong all the time; what right do I have to complain about other people, right?
So tonight I asked God to have a Come-t0-Jesus-Meeting with me (do y'all have those outside of Texas?) and He sure did.

My attitude adjustment came with the TRUTH of what is REALLY not fair in life. God laid it on my heart to watch Mel Gibson's "The Passion" movie for the umpteenth time tonight. One of my favorite movies. Always breaks my heart & I have to look away at some parts, like when Jesus is being beaten and spit on. But this time, I forced myself to watch every bit--
Here's what's "NOT FAIR:"
That Jesus lived a perfect, absolutely sinless life, and yet was punished for our sins. MY sins.
That Jesus loved me so much that he came down from his perfect life in heaven beside the Father, put up with people SPITTING IN HIS FACE, calling him horrendous names, blaspheming him, beating him until he was unrecognizable, and DYING for me. THAT's what isn't fair.
That I don't deserve a dang thing... and yet THIS is what he did for me:
I know it was Roman soldiers who put him on the cross, but it may as well have been MY hand on that nail, and my arm swinging that hammer. Because that's what it represented:

His Mercy. His Love. His Death. That's what's not fair.

Consider my attitude adjusted.

I will now go back to my regular programming.

Standing in Integrity

One of my favorite shirts says "Stand in Integrity."
Integrity is a word that means a lot to me. Perhaps because in my life I've encountered so many people without it. Something I've learned from all the things that have happened to me over the years: what NOT to do and how NOT to treat people. If nothing else, I've gotten that out of my mess.
Integrity is defined as: adherence to moral and ethical principles; soundness of moral character; honesty. But I have always thought of it in a simpler definition: Say what you mean, mean what you say, BE who you seem. When I 1st began teaching, I made that into a sign and hung it over my desk to remind me how to deal with colleagues and students alike.
Its sometimes really hard to have integrity in today's world, isn't it? Even just today I had to REALLY deal with the temptation to compromise my integrity as I wanted SO badly to spread some gossip about something "bad" I know about someone. All day I wanted to inform some people about some "behind the scenes info" that I know about someone that they don't... "you don't know the whole story, you see...just let me tell you what I know..." By the time evening came around, I was in the bathroom rebuking demons and telling the devil to take a hike to the cross and get dealt with by Jesus, shut up and get out of my head. Thankfully, God came to my aide once again.
Jesus had integrity. He was honest and told things as they are, even to the point of offending people who didn't want to hear what he had to say. But he stood on his moral principles, which were appointed to him by God. As God's Son, it was his job, and I would imagine that it was his pleasure to do so because he was a good man.
As a follower of Jesus Christ, it is also my job to have integrity. It is to be part of my own honor code: I must be honest, I must mean what I say and say what I mean. I need to not wear a mask (which is something I have a hard time with). I must be who I seem to be. That means my insides must match my outsides. That's a whole other post in itself! I think, however, that if we want a model of integrity, we need to look to Jesus.

DC Talk Spirit in the Sky

My sister and I used to be big fans of DC Talk, and this is also one of my favorite songs. I'm also a big fan of thunderstorms (see my previous post on thunderstorms, here somewhere). I thought this video was pretty cool.

Compassion International

Look who I just adopted! Isn't she precious? Her name is Jocelyn and she's 6 years old. She likes to play with dolls and goes to Bible School. Please pray for her. God did something really great for me today-- he helped my parents out in an awesome way by helping them get free from a lousy boss they had. I was so grateful that I wanted to do something for God to show my thankfulness. I can't think of anything I'd rather do for God than help take care of one of his children.


Sponsoring a child through Children International is easy and quick. You can search for children by many different criteria such as country, gender, need, age, and more. The cost is only $38 a month and for that you not only get the opportunity to pray for and take care of a specific child, but you can send them gifts, even send their family gifts if you like, enabling others to share the gospel with them, and get several letters a year in return. Best of all, you're helping take care of the children that Jesus loves and helping others spread the love of Jesus to them.

Let Freedom Ring

Happy 4th of July Everyone! As we honor the soldiers and those who fought for our independece, lets earnestly remember the One who we TRULY owe our freedom to... our Lord Jesus Christ.
Enjoy your celebrations!

Defeating Perfectionism

Do you ever feel like you have to be the perfect mother, the perfect Christian, the perfect teacher, the perfect wife, the perfect ________ [insert just about any title here]? I definitely do. For a long time I have struggled with perfectionism. With just about ANYTHING I've attempted in my life, I've wanted to do it perfectly-- or not at all. And of course, it was that type of behavior that got me accolades. An A+ in school was great. An A- got an "Why wasn't it an A+? Were you having an off day?" Argh.
When I was teaching, I wanted to be the perfect teacher. I HAD to see those "Exceeds Expectations" on my annual reviews. Those were scored a "Four". If I got a "Three" on anything, I was nearly devastated for many years. Of course, during the years I got all 4's, I was wishing there was such a thing as "Fives-- "Especially exceeds expectations" . Even perfect wasn't good enough for me.
The past year, I have been trying to be the perfect Christian. Somewhere in the Bible there is a verse about "Be ye perfect even as thy Father in Heaven is perfect..." That's a tall order for someone who is such a lowly sinner as myself. Even when I try my best to do something, many times I inevitably fail.
Then I look at the Apostle Paul, who wrote about "Christ lives in me" (Gal. 2:20) and "dying to self" and "killing the flesh". He wrote about "I have learned to be content whether I'm abased or abounded" and learning to live with everything or nothing. (Phil, 4:12).
And I think: THATS how I want to be! Now THERE'S an example of Christianity. What most of us Christians strive for : to be like how Paul wrote in his letters to the Galatians, the Colossians, and the Philippians. But, I almost always fail: its such a tall order, and day after day, as hard as I try and as much as I pray, I only make these teeny, tiny steps.
But you know what I found out?
Even Paul had trouble.
Even he said he did stuff he didn't want to do, as much as he didn't want to do. And that his only hope for help was Jesus.
You know how long Paul had been a Christian before he wrote those statements in his letters? A MINIMUM of 25 years. This man, who had seen Jesus face to face, had been a believer for at least 25 years before he was able to say "It is not I who live, but Christ who lives in me" and "I have learned to live with everything or with nothing." TWENTY FIVE YEARS. And this was a dude who had a face to face encounter with the Christ Jesus.
So I figure, if it took PAUL all those years to come up with this stuff....
do I have to get it all down in one year?
I don't think so.
The only perfect person that has ever lived, after all, was Jesus. The only one out of millions.
So I'm pretty sure its a baby-step thing, this "Becoming a Christian" thing. Or this "becoming anything" thing. If it took a great man like Paul decades, then I think I've got some wiggle-room here.
So if you're trying to be perfect at anything, give yourself some slack.
How about just trying to do one right thing at a time?
How about letting yourself off the hook just a little?
How about doing 1 thing better than you did yesterday? Or making 1 better choice?
For me, I've learned that's enough.
And God loves me anyway... The Bible says that although man may look at outward appearance, The LORD looks at the heart. God knows that my heart is in the right place.
Even if I don't have 100 Bible verses memorized.
Even if some days I forget to brush my teeth.
Even if some days I don't read my Bible.
Even if I am not like Paul.
Even if I am not perfect.